bitteraftertaste | twenty three ♥ video

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[It's been quiet, since the gas leak. She hasn't heard anything about any progress being made on narrowing down the list of who might have done it, but it isn't like she can hold it against the people who had promised to look into it, as frustrating as it might be. Too much on the Barge goes unnoticed, unpunished, and it's a waste of time and energy to

But lately, it feels as though most of what she's doing here is a waste of time and energy. She's restless and bored, and has been for some time. The only reason she's still here is because of James, and as much as she loves him (and she does, she absolutely does), she just... can't be here indefinitely. Can't be here for another month, at this point.

She brings it up after he's been out of the infirmary for a while, after dinner when they're on the couch with some wine. She's got her head on his shoulder, her legs tucked up on the cushion, and for a long moment, she's almost reluctant to say anything at all because she doesn't want to walk away from this, not for a second time.

It comes out anyway.]

I've been doing some thinking.

[Public]

[Vesper's in her room, sitting at a desk, and looks as put together and professional as usual.

She doesn't waste time with memories, or explaining what the ship has done for her, or how she feels about leaving. That's no one's business but her own]

I'm leaving. [And she's not expecting there to be a lot of sad feelings about this. It's not as if she's gone out of her way to make friends here, so it doesn't especially bother her.] For good, hopefully. I've been here for well over a year now, and I think it's important to realize when you've spent as much time here as you can.

[This isn't running away. It's choosing to build a life for herself outside of this place, something she hadn't had when she first arrived here.

She smiles a little wryly when she thinks of how to conclude this, this incredibly strange second chance she'd been given.]

It's been... an experience.

[Private to Cassel]

[There's one person apart from James that she's especially sad about leaving behind, and in many ways, this is a lot harder than telling her - she still doesn't have a term she likes to describe their relationship, and she's not sure she ever really will - boyfriend.

It's ridiculous to think of Cassel as a son for so many reasons, but she's stopped trying to question her feelings of responsibility for the teenager a long time ago, and they're making it difficult to be really comfortable with saying goodbye.]

Where are you planning on going, once you've finished with the Barge?

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I'm just relieved you're not planning on staying here forever, [She comments dryly, knowing that was never really a legitimate concern to have. He's too committed to the job to want to stay here forever, wasting away working for a boss who makes MI6 look like an over affectionate nanny.

She looks up at him seriously, smiling a little.]

I love you.

[She wants to make sure he knows that, that this isn't her running away from him, or abandoning him here. It's just not somewhere she can be anymore.]

[Christ, no. He can't imagine it, a lifetime of drudgery interupted by brief moments of clarity, brief murder attempts, nothing solid or lasting or particularly real. He's here for one reason. After that, he has a job to return to.

Lifting his hand from her shoulder to card his fingers through her hair, he leans in to kiss her soundly.]

I know. [He doesn't say it often, himself. Too often, and they just become words.]

I'll come with you, a while. [Set up a life, properly, together. Then he'll come back. To Cassel, to Ellie, to murderers and innocents and every shade of grey there between.]

[She kisses him back, and something warm and pleasant settles in her chest. Relief, or hope or something like that, and it's good, because she can still remember how awful it had felt to feel empty, and hollow and worthless.

She hasn't felt like that in a long time, and it's such a relief to know that that's all behind her.]

I'd like that. [In a lot of ways, it's more than she expected.] I'd say I'd get everything ready for you in the meantime, but I'm not sure I'd want the time to.

[It's a joke, because when he comes back for good, it really should be like no time at all has gone by. Otherwise she's going to need to have a chat with the big man in charge.]

[They'd both be having a very long chat. As it is, he quirks his mouth a little wryly, leaning forward to set his glass down on the table so he can run a hand over her jaw.]

For the best, really. What if your taste in apartments is secretly awful?

Excuse me, [She scoffs, indignant, although she also shifts to put her glass aside.]> My taste is impeccable. And at least you'll have someone to look after the place when you're not there. I'd imagine it's a bit of a mess after a month of chasing down terrorist in Cairo, or wherever.

[Not like she's going to be your maid or anything, but at least you won't have to wander home and realize damn, I have a pile of dirt laundry that's been sitting here for weeks.]

Edited 2014-02-03 06:37 (UTC)

The maid keeps it well enough in order. [A smirk pulls at the corners of his mouth.] Unless you think I ought to dismiss her. [By which he means, unless she wants to play the part herself. He's teasing.]

Please, I'm not your maid. [Although what she is to him has always been a little ill defined, and that's not likely to change when they go home. Not that she minds.

She settles against him a little more firmly, still relieved that they've still got some time together before he runs off on the next mission thrown his way to do god knows what god knows where. At least it's something that his time on the Barge won't matter much to her.]

But you would look so very elegant in a maid's uniform. [He drops his hand to her side, tickling lightly even as he kisses her head when she settles against him. He's trying to hide an almost boyish smile.

As much as he might miss her, he'll be glad she's home, where her safety and sanity is relatively assured.]

[She laughs, doesn't try to swat him away except maybe for show. It would be nice, if they could just have this somewhere, permanently, and not have to worry about death or danger or political bullshit.

That's not how the real world works, though. Not even here. And she knows it would get boring for him.]

When would you be comfortable leaving?

Tomorrow. [Better not to risk her changing her mind, and there's nothing he can't resolve when he returns. Assuming the Admiral has no intention of toying with his intentions.]

Let's go tomorrow.

twenty three ♥ video

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