[But he does, and he nudges Martin off his lap before he stands again, going for the bar. Then he can stand with his back to her, instead of just avoid her eyes. Because he thinks his are getting red.]
I don't know, I just - I'm--
[He's grabbed the scotch and a glass, and he hauls off and throws the glass at the opposite wall, away from her and the cat. It shatters, and for half a second, he feels better.]
I'm so bloody angry with them! They wouldn't take me with them! What did they think they were doing, going off fucking mountain climbing? They should've been more careful! They shouldn't have gone!
[He feels completely irrational, out of control, and his eyes are wet when he finally turns to look at her again. He does feel like a bully, like a monster, and he doesn't know how to stop feeling that way.]
I don't want them to be proud of me, I just - want them to come back--
Re: Spam
[But he does, and he nudges Martin off his lap before he stands again, going for the bar. Then he can stand with his back to her, instead of just avoid her eyes. Because he thinks his are getting red.]
I don't know, I just - I'm--
[He's grabbed the scotch and a glass, and he hauls off and throws the glass at the opposite wall, away from her and the cat. It shatters, and for half a second, he feels better.]
I'm so bloody angry with them! They wouldn't take me with them! What did they think they were doing, going off fucking mountain climbing? They should've been more careful! They shouldn't have gone!
[He feels completely irrational, out of control, and his eyes are wet when he finally turns to look at her again. He does feel like a bully, like a monster, and he doesn't know how to stop feeling that way.]
I don't want them to be proud of me, I just - want them to come back--